Free Wig (with exciting update!)
I found this in the parking lot between Double Fine and the Bank of America.
A fashionable wig of a almost-indescribable color I shall call, “Mocha Champagne,” complete with little bits of hay and a functional hair clip!
What happened? You were about to rob the BofA, but at the last minute you realized your Golden Girls costume wouldn’t work, so you ditched it? Or were you on your way to Double Fine for a job interview, and realized you should just come as yourself, not disguised as Tippi Hedren from The Birds? Or were you actually Tippi Hedren from the Birds, and this was an actual chunk of your actual hair that some birds tore off your scalp in Bodega Bay and flew all the way down to San Francisco, just to abandon it here because they had finally licked off all the blood? Or were you just taking a hay ride down Brannan Street and it hit a bump and you flew, feet-first, into a pothole and are right now underneath that hair making muffled screams for help?
Some times a news page asks more questions than it answers.
U P D A T E :
I checked in with our wig later on that day, on my way out of the office. Looks like he made some progress home! He had moved at least 15 feet, and was just about to try navigating the crosswalk.
Watch out for that bike, Wiggy!
Remember, the walk of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
Oh, how rude of me. I forgot you don’t have feet. Ouch.
Well, hopefully you are full of lice, and they can all pitch in and get you moving.