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Half-tuck is the new Mullett


I just finished Uncharted: Drake’s Fortune, and I will tell you this: I liked it a lot. It had beautiful environments, fun platforming, and the awesome phrase, “I’ll kick you to sleep!” You should all go play it right now. It was all super next-gen, but the most next-gen thing about it to me was Drake’s shirt. Check it out: Somehow it’s tucked in, and yet not tucked in, at the very same time. Of all the technical marvels contained in Uncharted, this was the one that really mystified me.

Yes, the shirt was dirty, like he had partied in it all night, passed out, threw up on himself repeatedly in his sleep, and was then left in a ditch outside of town by his mean friends. And by the time he walked home his shirt was dry, so he just said, “The hell with it. Let’s go find some treasure.”

So, on his left side, he tucked the shirt in, to show his trim figure and stylish belt buckle. “What a handsome young man,” you might say, “If he gets that shirt washed, he may date my daughter.” But his right side is untucked, like the shirt of a wild man, a renegade, a scoundrel. “What is that guy up to? Why is his shirt untucked? Does he not give a damn about me and my rules?”

At no time during the game does Drake stop and tuck in the loose part of his shirt. Nor does he ever just say, “The hell with it!” and untuck the whole thing. It remains in a state of half dress for the length of the game, through all sorts of climbing, jumping, and scampering. Jet skiing, swimming, and almost kissing—nothing can dislodge or fully tuck Drake’s half-casual shirt. It is draped in a purgatory state, half in, half out, never completely free. It’s like an unfinished symphony.

Then I realized what a clever invention the half-tuck is. How better to show off your rock-hard abs, but still create an air of nonchalance? Much like how a mullet shows the world your business side in the front, and your party side in the back, the half-tuck tells one story on the right side, but a completely different story on the left. In encapsulates the contradiction that you are: The shy extrovert, the organized slob, the guy who likes to shop at Banana Republic but also likes to fall into the Gap when he’s feeling a little crazy. The half-tuck reassures the ladies that you’re a man who cares about personal grooming, but who, at the same time, couldn’t give a f##k. Who doesn’t like that?

Of all the treasure I found on this quest, I think this little fashion tip is the one I will cherish the most.

3
17
01/22/2008 - 05:23 PM
01/22/08 - 09:27 PM
Aridi:

"I might have to get this game. I'm a sucker for treasure hunting."
01/22/08 - 10:28 PM
Molbork:

"I'm really looking forward to getting a PS3 this year and this game will be one of the first I'm going to play. My personal rule though is if your off the clock and in my presence you better un-tuck that shirt. Guess this shows how hardcore he is since he's always on the clock searching for treasure and rocking out."
01/23/08 - 12:06 AM
SteveG:

"Glad to see the next-gen storytelling and gameplay of Uncharted: Drake's Fortune weren't so riveting as to distract you from the intricacies of a dude's shirt"
01/23/08 - 05:23 AM
willy:

"Maybe the shirt is just really filthy, so it has developed a dirty crust, making it all stiff. That would explain the constant purgatory state throughout the game."
01/23/08 - 09:02 AM
daxter:

"What I found funny about this one was that they made over 200 animations or so they said. In the actual game the character controlled like he was made of paper rather than obeying the laws of physics. In the end, I enjoyed this one too, only until the Resident Evil part in the game that is. :)"
01/23/08 - 10:51 AM
Ofiler:

"You're talking about his shirt. What bugged me were his sleeves. They're only half-way rolled up. Eventually, those sleeves are gonna' roll themselves down again. No long-sleeved anything I've ever worn has stayed rolled up through any of *my* many wondrous adventures in far off exotic lands. This game is so unrealistic."
01/23/08 - 11:12 AM
A Schafer created character name:

"To bad Riggs belt buckle will not allow such a thing."
01/23/08 - 12:22 PM
Razputin:

"Hihih :) ."
01/23/08 - 04:42 PM
mrtomsmith:

"I might have to get this game. I’m a sucker for fine shirtery."
01/23/08 - 05:30 PM
ProggleRock:

"Only you, Tim. Only you."
01/24/08 - 05:43 AM
that_guy:

"I have my shirt half tucked in most of the time as well. And it's a serious pain in the arse to keep that up. You allways have to adjust it, so that you can keep that easy going look up. One of the many problems you'll encounter with this style, is you shirt accidentely getting stuck in you boxers. That looks just incredibly silly.. And don't get me started on half rolled up sleeves.. It's even harder than the half-tuck thing.. Remember: Having that easy going, I don't care for my appeareance at all, I just happen to look really cool without even trying look requires a lot of work. Especially if you don't want anybody to notice that you're constantly adjusting your attire. And you don't want them to notice, because that would instantly spoil everything.."
01/24/08 - 12:12 PM
Nude Grease:

"Now, I both roll up my sleeves and half-tuck my shirts... but its a subconsious thing! I mean I do it without even thinking about it. I tend to roll and un-roll my sleeves especially like 13 times an hour. Sometimes I'll have one rolled and the other un-rolled. MADNESS!!!"
01/24/08 - 10:13 PM
Apple Pop:

"Soon, all wonderful people of world over will be into this hip tucked/ un-tucked fashion trend. The wave of the future."
01/25/08 - 08:46 AM
Economypear:

"I wonder if this will be as popular as Trucker Hats?"
01/28/08 - 11:17 PM
pr0ph37:

"Besides the mullet and the half tuck, I like the Job hat. You know, the mullet hat. It's like a painters cap but then it has 2 flaps in the back. Classic. Nothing like it! I'm talking about styles not necessarily the game."
02/01/08 - 03:05 PM
masquerade:

"I might have to get enough money to get a PS3 so I can dream about getting this game. Isn't this known as ''frigging-belt syndrome''? Usually occurring when a new belt is obtained. The leather is still pretty stiff and you have yet to acquaint yourself with the dynamics of a new belt; thus your clothing is constantly hooked on the thing because it no longer knows where to go. Like a child abandoned in a store-- it just stands there in all it's distressed glory, wondering where it all went wrong and trying to decide whether moving would be the wisest decision."
02/09/11 - 03:21 PM
Tim Schafer:

"Those "job hats" or painter's hats were cool when I was in high school ('81-'85!). One guy had an Iron Maiden painter's hat I really liked. BUT the ultimate specimen in my high school was a painter's cap where the top part was shaped and printed to look like a tin of Copenhagen chewing tobacco!"
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