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Tim Schafer Tim


Three of our s p o o k i e s t programmers wanted to wish you Happy Halloween.

Oooh, look at them! Aren’t they scary?

There’s Kee, who is always blurry. No one can figure out why. So freaky.

And hiding behind the pumpkin is Caroline. That’s pretty freaky, don’t you think? I mean what kind of crazy lady goes around on Halloween, hiding behind pumpkins? A scary crazy lady, that’s who.

And then behind Kee, there’s Amy, who likes to drink human blood at her desk. I hear.

It’s just a rumor, but it explains a lot, trust me.

And then there’s Erik in the background, who looks like he’s faith-healing Amy’s cheekbone. The scary thing about that is what he pulled out right after I snapped this picture…

You see, apparently, Amy had an ant lodged in her sinus cavity. Not scary, you say? Well it was a QUEEN ant, which means it probably laid eggs in there. So soon Amy’s cheeks are going to be full of ANTS. Still not scared? Well what if you were in a relay race with Amy, but it was the kind where you have to pass an orange that you’re holding under your chin, and right when you’re neck-to-neck with Amy, her ANT CHEEKS EXPLODE and you’re covered with bloody ants and cheek chunks? And what if Amy screamed “My cheeks! My cheeks!” so loud that your heavy-prescription eyeglasses shattered, and the car you were driving swerved off the road and landed upside-down in a breeding pond at a leech farm? And what if Amy’s blood drove the leeches into a mad feeding frenzy, and they got so excited that they crawled into her open cheeks and took over her body and made her walk the countryside, putting leech eggs into the macaroni salad at Fresh Choice restaurants all over the nation? And then what if you went to a Fresh Choice, and unknowingly ate leech/macaroni salad, and one of those leech eggs hatched inside your belly, and ate it’s way out, and then that leech grew up to invent a doomsday weapon that would eventually destroy the earth? And then what if you slowly walked around the charred, smoking ruins of destroyed Earth… and you found… hanging on the door handle… A gleaming, metal HOOK!!!

Oooh, man. Scared myself there with that last part. Anyway, thanks to famed Brazilian artist Kjeld Pedersen for the Double Fine pumpkin. Look how carefully he carved the babies’ hairs! Take it from me, you have to have a steady hand to carve baby hair well.

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