I would like to announce that an announcement is coming soon.
And when you read this announcement, not only will you crap your pants, but you will crap your neighbors pants. You will crap your neighbor’s pants so hard, that your neighbor will have to repaint his whole house. But he will be laughing the whole time because this announcement is as good as a million pairs of pants. This announcement is as good as a million pairs of solid gold, MAGIC pants.
“Magic pants” would be a good name for the male equivalent of the Wonder Bra, I think.