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Thursday, August 22, 2002

Tim Schafer Tim

Okay, Double Fine has two new best friends:

  1. Someone named only “Numble,” for finding the Easter egg hidden with in this site. The very site you are reading right now. I was wondering when someone was going to notice that. In case you haven’t found it yet, here’s a hint: when you find it, you’re going to say, “Oh, man. That’s dull.”
  2. Martin M., from Holliston , MA , for actually buying the Official Xbox Magazine with the Psychonauts article in it, scanning his receipt, and sending it in as part of our Naked Lady Giveaway.

As promised, I drew a naked lady and sent it to Martin. I hope you like it, you perv. Maybe I should have warned you—I can not actually draw. But if you understand fine art, you should be able to make out that she is holding a hammer and some nails. I imagined she was working on a house somewhere, like in the South, where it’s hot and people are naked a lot. Also, I hope you appreciate the fact that I drew it on a post-it note so you don’t have to worry about expensive hanging devices—it’s ready to hang right out of the envelope!

Piece of advice: get that post-it note insured. Once Psychonauts comes out and the world recognizes it for what it is—not merely the greatest game ever made but easily the most significant document produced by mankind—and they burn the Mona Lisa and they smash Michelangelo’s David because no other work of art is worthy of sharing the same planet with something as beautiful and true as Psychonauts—and after they rip the Constitution of the United States out of it’s class case and replace it with a copy of our game—when all of that happens, you are going to be able to put your kids through college with that naked lady, my friend. Hell, you are going to be able to BUY your kids each their own college. They could have a summer college, a winter college, a college just for your dogs, and a college out by the pool that they just use to change in and out of their swimsuits.

But—you’re never going to have kids, Martin M., if you don’t shake your addiction to porn and go find a real lady. That’s the real lesson here today.

Associated games

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